If I Could Only Remember
by Freekness X Yaoi
Summary: This short haired, bright eyed girl, is named Anna Marie.. but if it wasn't for the bracelet around her wrist she wouldn't know that... waking up in a place you don't know is one thing, But try waking up in a new place, new time, and to a new lover? This is Anna Marie's predicament, everything she once knew was now gone, and everyone she loved went with it...
1. Chapter 1

Sun light filters into the dark room through a slight open curtain. An a cool breeze crosses my skin through the cracked window. My eyes flutter open, i slowly sit up to look around. My surrounding's are unfamiliar. I sit in a huge bed, silk red sheets cover me, the walls are dark an bare. I look at myself, but my mind draws a blank... I stand from the very comfy bed, bare feet touch cold wood, an i look down to see myself in a very expensive looking night gown.

I walked around the room looking for something to stir my memory. I came to a desk an picked up a photo, in it was a very handsome man, smiling, with his arms happily wrapped around someone. Then there was a girl, she looked so happy, but also, so sick. I found a door that led to a bathroom. I splashed some water in my face then looked up to the mirror. The girl i saw i did not know... She had bright blue grey eyes, Black hair that fell in choppy messy layers to her shoulders, an had bangs right above her eyes.

Though she looked just like the girl in the picture she was still different. Skin was milky smooth, there were no bags under her eyes, an lips a rosy baby pink. Who was this girl looking back at me, or the better question being... Who was I...

No memories were coming back to me, no sudden rush, my mind felt as if i was floating in an empty void of black. I put my head in my hands as a headache came up. I looked to my wrist discovering a bracelet. It was white plastic with typed lettering. Something you would see at a hospital... The name on the band was Anna Marie...

there was a sudden knock on the door an my head whipped around! I was scared... The door slowly opened an in walked the same man that was in the picture. His eye lit up an with great speed wrapped his arms around me. This man was much taller then me and i could have swore i felt tears on my shoulder. Before i knew it are lip were in a deep kiss. One of desperation, like something you see in a romance movie when the lovers haven't been together for a long time. I'll admit i got a feeling of comfort, when he did this, but my confusion overpowered it...

He pulls back and placed his hands on my cheeks looking deep in my eyes and said.. "My love, your finally awake.. I was so scared, i thought i lost you..."

His words were so passionate, an tears threaten to fall from his beautiful eyes. And though i felt as if i needed to comfort him, tell him everything was going to be just fine now, i couldn't. His eyes then filled with sorrow an so much shock when i asked...

"I'm sorry, do i know you?"

Hey guys so this was just the beginning of the first chapter, kinda like a sneak peak. If anyone really enjoys it, please let me know. And if i see it is getting some reads it always make me more motivated to update. This is a Black Butler Fanfic, and i will try my best to keep it back in the time of there setting but im giving u a heads up i might forget an give it just a hit of modern.

My other stories are at a stand still with cause i've lost connectinn withththem so now I'm starting fresh. Hope you guys liked.

P.S. What do u guys think this story can lead either way.. So i ask you this Who should Anna's mistirious lover be?

~Nessie~


	2. Three OldNew Faces

**Hey everyone so first off I want to give a great big thanks to my first two reviewers! Here your shout-out guys! LovelyWinter, and PeterFrost-girl1… LOVE YOU! YOU'RE JUST FULL OF AWESOMESAUSE!**

**Anyhow do to my unsurity I have not decided who Anna Marie's lover will be yet... I do have a new poll up so if everyone votes it might help with the deciding.**

**Now let's get on with the show!**

**Chapter 2 – Three Old/New Faces…**

**DISCLAIMER! As sad as it is I do not own anything Black Butler only Anna Marie is mine.**

Anna's P.O.V

The man in-front of me stood shocked and hurt… the eager to comfort him was overwhelming. I reached my hand out to touch his cheek but before I could pain raked through my head and I held my skull like it would split. I felt the world get heavy and the next thing I saw was the ceiling and then black…

I was now in darkness floating through a thick black, then there was the slightest candle glow… bare feet step down on black and red cracked tile floor. There was one big arm chair a night stand holding three lit candles, and a big floating mirror. I swooped my black baby doll dress under myself before sitting in the chair. I looked to the mirror, and saw myself but not quite. She looked better than the girl in the picture from before but not as well as when I looked in the bathroom… The girl suddenly touched the mirror and spoke... "Hello Anna…"

I sat back in my chair startled…. "How can u speak... your me… Right?"

"Yes Anna I am you… I'm your memories, you blacked out because you were thrown into a situation to fast. I pulled u back here into your mind to heel… Anna you have to be careful you're in grave danger…"

I looked at her funny and confused. "What do you mean? How? Who am I and where am I? Who was that man that kissed me?" I was asking so many questions and she just had a sad look

"I'm sorry..." She said. "But there are thing you can't know yet. For I don't know them either. Anna listens carefully okay for I can tell you what I do know... Are thoughts have been lost, locked away by another… As I search you will remember bit by bit, but if you push this is what happens. There are secrets that are too overwhelming… Your life has changed for we are not human anymore, do you understand so far?"

I nod yes.

"Good… Now as for the man who kissed you, then memories came so full forced in order to keep you from more harm they have been blurred. When you see these people again all you will have is a feeling, but nothing more."

She showed me a scene of the bathroom when the man came in, but everything about him was blurred even his face I couldn't remember.

"Now Anna it is time to rest, when you awake once again you will be back to yourself, and word of advice watch yourself…"

I nodded to her again then curled up in the chair. I was still quite confused at all this but I still hopped.

When I opened my eyes again I was back in the room lying in the big king bed. I stood once again the memories from before nothing but blurs, I look down to see that I was back in the night gown. I lick my lips and gulp extremely thirsty then a light knock was on the door. Scared at first I gave a slight stutter. "E…Enter..."

The door creaked open to a red head behind it with thick round glasses…

"Lady Marie!" She spoke with surprise and a thick accent. "I'm so happy you're awake! I have brought you some close…" I tilted my head to the side confused and she looked sad, and then mumbled something under her breath. "Never mind me my lady, I'm just happy you're awake, come let's get you cleaned up…"

The girl pushed me towards the bathroom and started a bath. Once ready she helped me strip and step in. (For some reason it didn't feel awkward around her.) I sat for a few minutes before she started to wash my hair.

"I'm sorry," I said. "That I don't remember you."

She gave me a small smile and said. "No worries Lady Marie, you've been through so much. My name is Mey-rin; I am the maid to the Phantomhive House and our Lord Ciel Phantomhive. You and eye also were very close, being the only two girls in the household." She smiled and I smiled back as we finished up.

She helped me out of the tub and I dried off walking back to the bedroom. I put on my under garment and then she helped me into a loose corset and a soft long black dress. It was a slight fit and flare, short sleeved and a slight caller. She then handed me a letter.

"Lady Marie this is for you from my master. You are free to wonder the ground but please don't go beyond unless myself or another staff is with you, the note explains the rest."

She then bowed her head, and took her leave. I turn sitting on the bed and opened the envelope. Pulling out a short letter that said.

_Dearest Anna Marie,_

_I couldn't be happier that you are now awake, and yet I regretfully say that I will not be there when u are about. I have been called away on business and will return to London tomorrow. Mey-rin has been instructed to bring you to my villa in town when I come back. Feel free to the Manor beforehand._

_Ceil…_

That name rang through my head and the feeling of caring went with it, still utterly confused decided to take there advise and walk around a bit. I exited the bed room and just started to look around. There were many other guest bedrooms, a study, a game room, and even a great big Library. I soon came to a stop when I found a kitchen and could hear Mey-rin screaming at someone. I slowly walk in and they don't even notice.

"You cannot cook dinner with your Flame-through! The master would be very upset, yes he will!"

"But the master isn't here now is he!" The scruffy blond man yelled back at her, flinging around the weapon.

"What about Sebastian you know he finds out everything!" She yelled back. At their bickering I couldn't help but giggle a little catching there attention. Mey-rin gave me a big smile before coming over to me and places her hand on my shoulder.

"I'm so happy to see you up and about Lady Marie."

"Yeah we have missed you terribly." The scruffy man said I looked at him with a look that said _"And your name is."_ He rubbed the back of his neck and said, "It's me Bardroy."

"And I'm Finny," a younger blond boy said coming into the kitchen.

I gave them both an apologetic look before Mey-rin lightens the mood. "Well then Lady Marie I'm sure you're starving how about some dinner?" She asked and I nodded

"Can I please cook? I may not remember faces or my past right now, but everything else I do, and I got the strangest feeling you three really like my cooking. Plus it might help jog some memories."

The three nod sitting in stools at a little table. I turn to the stove and start to think of recipiece. My head pounds a little from memories but soon enough I remember where thing are put and starts to make a pasta dish. Once done I place it at the tables and their eyes light up before eating. I sit with them and eat also. Pain increases in my head as images flash before me. It was the four of us eating meals like this and I could see me baking treat and how happy they would be.

The pain stops as I feel dizzy yet can't help the little laugh. The three other look at me with a worried face. And then I said, "I remember… I remember you three loving my cookies... and how happy we were together."

They all smile and me. "That great news!" Finny cheered.

"Yes it is your were right that it would jog your memory cooking again." Said Bard.

"Yes but I do believe you need your rest now Lady Marie." Says Mey-rin

The two of us walk back to the bedroom as I see Finny and Bard start to clean up. Mey-rin helps me out of my dress and into my nightgown.

"Have a nice night Lady Marie; I'm really happy you are starting to remember things." She said with a smile and took her leave.

I crawled into the big bed and fluffed my pillow before lying with a flop. A light sigh slips my lips and I slowly once again fall into the darkness…

**Okay everyone I really hope you guys liked this update… I'll really try to make this a once a week update and I just loved hearing your reviews and don't forget to please vote on whom Anna's lover should be…**

**~Nessie~**


	3. Reacquainting

**Hello Everyone! I know I'm a day late with update but something came up yesterday and I couldn't Sowy! Now I just have two things to say…**

**#1 – I'm still deciding on who Anna Maries lover be, (I'm leaning more toward Sebastian but can't decide a certain someone also said Alois and that got me thinking to) so for now I will just continue on and it will be one big mystery of who that kiss came from (smiles evilly) **

**#2 - This chapter is dedicated to PeterFrost-girl1! Thax for the review and I'm so happy your enjoying!**

**Now on with the show! **

**Chapter 3 – Reacquainting**

**(Disclaimer- sadly I do not own anything Black Butler only Anna Marie is mine and this story) WARNING! I did not do a lot of editing on this chapter I was really tired but wanted to get it up so there may be some grammar flaws…**

Anna's P.O.V

That night was spent back in my head talking to myself in the floating mirror. (And that statement didn't sound crazy.) There wasn't much I could understand, but I got the jiff. Basically remembering the times with everyone even as insignificant that baking cookies might be, was big enough to open a locked door and now more like them will come.

The morning came too quickly; I stood from the bed and went to the bathroom for a bath. I cleaned up and came out in a robe and Mey-rin was waiting for me with a very elegant gown. The dress was a bright aqua blues the black detailing of thrones vines. It also had short sleeves that hung off my shoulders. She helped me in my corset and in dress, and then slid short black lace gloves on my hands. I laced up my boots then Mey-rin, and I walked down to the kitchen for breakfast.

The four of us sat in silence; afterwards bard stood and went to get the carriage ready.

"Bard can I come with you to see the horses?" I asked having a feeling that something good was there. Bard smiled big nodding yes.

We got out to the horses stable. You could hear them being loud, almost like they were talking to one another. Inside a lot of them looked alike. I started to wonder looking at all the horses when I got to the last stable this one horse looked different from the others. This one was a pure beauty. She was all white accept for her long black main and tail. And right above her noise was a black crescent moon.

"Moon-Light," I spoke softly and she looked up at me and came trotting over all acceded. Like she hasn't seen an old friend in a long time. She gently touched her noise to mine making me laugh and smile. I open the gate and walk in her stall combing through her main. Suddenly a bright flash went off and my head ached! Memories surged but only fragments. I was slammed back against the wall, as my head spins with deep memories. Everything was blurred but there was one thing for sure. Moon-Light, and Fire…

I sat on the floor with my head in my hands as bard and Mey-rin came running over.

"Lady Marie are u alright!?" she asked full of worry.

"I'm alright, please don't fret over me." Bard helped me up. "Really it was nothing; I just tripped and fell as I was getting some memories back." The two exchanged worry glances before giving me a smile. "You know would it be okay instead of taking the carriage Mey-rin, could you and I ride into town?"

"What a lovely idea Lady Marie." She said, Bard the pulled out Moon-Light and another horse saddling them up. We walked back to the manor where finny waited with my bag and we strapped them onto my horse. Bard helped me up on my horse side saddle and Mey-rin and I set off for town.

The ride was quiet accept for the slight small talk between us. Then we soon arrived to the London home. Mey-rin was the first to get off. She walked up and knocked on the door, not a second later the door swung open. I watched as a very tall and very handsome man came over to where I was. He had black hair and gorges caramel brown eyes. He smiled at me and helped my off Moon-Light.

"Welcome Miss Anna, I am Sebastian Michaelis, my master is waiting for u." he said with a smile, but as I stood there and looked in his eyes, all I saw was pure sadness. Before I had another thought about it we went inside. I was escorted to a big study room were a boy no older than 13 sat behind the desk.

The butler Sebastian went behind the desk and whispered something in his ear, once he stood up there was a sudden rack of pain in my head and I instantly dropped to my knees. The next thing I remember was black…

When I opened my eyes again there I sat in the chair and my reflection was rubbing her temples in frustration… I asked her what was wrong and she just gave me a sad smile…

"It seems that fate is not on are side Anna Marie. I have tried everything to keep most painful memories at bay but I think it's time to get the others out of the way. My hope by doing this is that when little memories like this one and it triggers something it won't be as bad. Do you trust me Anna?"

I felt this question to be a little silly but nodded yes and sat back in the chair readying myself. Then the mirror changed, images of the past flashed buy like and old movie, and there were names Ciel, Sebastian, Mey-rin, Bard, Finny, even a girl named Lizzy. So many thing past by and my head started to ache. I could see myself happy, cooking, cleaning, and always by this boy side, but a friend no more of a sister! then they stopped.

I lay dazed against the chair, remembering the time with Ciel and the others. I was Anna Marie that I knew for sure, I help around the Phantomhive manor, and I help Ciel with cases, because he works with the queen… And yet with all this new information, swimming in my head, gaps were still left. Who was Anna Marie, before her friends took her in? What was her past, what caused her to see fire and fear so long ago? What was the danger now seeker after her… And what was this aching in her heart, who was the man she kissed, and seemed to once love…

The refection appeared back in the mirror a look of worry look on her face. I reassured her I was all right and only tired.

"With something appear you will still have only feelings, but now you will be able to go on a little easier. Please Anna rest now, we will talk soon…" After that she disappeared and the candles dimed slightly as I fell back into sleep.

They opened once again and I was sitting in a bedroom. I was still wherein my dress and sat up holding my hand in my head. It still had the dull pain left. I looked around the room at everything. I stood and smiled, running my hands across the walls, the soft rug, and cool hard wood floor. I reached the window and through open the doors and the cool breeze rushed past me. The smile on my face just grew, feeling of happiness, overwhelmed me when I recalled all the time at the manor, and my friend ships with everyone… And yet the sadness also remained. I could remember a thing of who my lover was, or who was after me… I tried to toss the side and focus on only happy ones right now but an even sadder one filled my memory. The last time I was in this town house, was on the Jack the Ripper case….

I tear slipped and I sighed heavily, the clock behind me then chimed. When I remembered the time I ran from my room as fast as I could! _"Please still be up… please still be up…" _

Though yes I will admit to anyone who asks that what I am doing right now is terribly un-lady like. Running around the halls, no shoes on… (Truthfully on the outside I look and act like the proper lady, but on this inside… hehe well you'll find out) Before I even considered it I flung open Ciel's bedroom door and burst in with almost tear in my eyes.

Sebastian and Ciel just stared at me like I was crazy. I got the biggest smile ever planted on my face and screamed "Ciel!" then flung my arms around him in a big hug. I pulled back and kissed his cheek hard, and giggled when I watched him get a big pink blush. Before he could say anything to my actions I stopped him and said still with my smile…

"I remember you!"

**Well evewryone I hoped you enjoyed this story, I think I might be moving a bit fast and if you think so to let me know and I can try to slow it down. Please Review it does help with the inspiration!**

**~Nessie~ **


End file.
